"Think about your Soul as this big beautiful beach ball. It floats, naturally. 

Imagine now submerging that beach ball into the deep end of a swimming pool. What does it want to do? What DOES it do, naturally?
 
That's right, it floats to the top, effortlessly.
 
Our Souls do the same thing. They shine effortlessly. They Love effortlessly. They are always connected to abundance and joy.
 
It's the human part of us that needs the work, not the Spiritual.
 
At our core, we are perfect. It's what is wrapped around the core that needs to be cleared.
 
So what happens is that over time, we go through life and unconsciously acquire limiting beliefs, meanings and stories about life that shrink us. The Soul is still in there dying to express, but we've covered it up. You can think about all these limiting beliefs and stories as big rusty chains that are holding the beach ball down at the bottom of the pool. With so many chains, it's stuck down there.
 
Even though the natural tendency of the beach ball is to effortlessly rise to the top, it can't because there is too much stuff in the way.
 
The same is true of us. Our Soul wants to express but there are a lot of chains of limiting beliefs, thoughts and the like that keep us repressed and unfulfilled. And without investigating these limiting beliefs and stories, feeling the feelings that come along with them and then understanding their origin, it doesn't matter how much yoga or meditation we do, we are still chained at the bottom of the pool and trying our hardest to get to the top. But no amount of effort can get us there if the chains of our hearts and minds go uninvestigated.
 
This is why you can't become more spiritual! You already ARE 10000% spiritual – there are just major blocks that cover it up.
 
So once we start to dive deep into the limiting beliefs and the blocks, then all of a sudden a new world emerges and slowly, one by one, the chains are taken off. Eventually, one day what happens… boom – the ball will float and rise to the top, naturally. It doesn't have to prove its worth, it doesn't have to be stern and strict or righteous, it just has to be itself unchained and it rises.
 
The same is true for you.
 
To discover a limiting belief, start to think about your dreams.
 
And then think of all the reasons why they haven't come true.
 
Think about all the reasons why you are scared to do it. Think about all the reasons why your parents, or friends or people you know say it can't be done. This is the beginning of understanding what holds you back.
 
If you weigh all those thoughts and opinions against the still, calm voice within that is connected to The Divine, you will begin to see it's all fear manifesting itself as impressive creativity, but not Truth.
 
And that Truth is this: your fears and insecurities are only as real as you believe them to be. The Truth is that you're unlimited and free.
 
Step into that. Are you willing?" 

--------------------------

"In its natural state, our mind is calm.
 
From birth, most of us in the Western World are inundated with thoughts, stories, ideas and messages that are basically a cry for us to freak out, for us to worry or for us to be scared.
 
Many of these messages are fueled by fear, with an underlying intent to sway our opinion or get us to buy something.
 
It's like the message a lot of the media and the advertisers are sending to us is, "Unless you are perfectly, perfectly perfect, never have anything happen to you, are always happy, never emotional in a negative way, have the perfect body, perfect outfit and perfect relationship, then you need to buy something."
 
And we get hypnotized, again and again, by the fears and insecurities of others. And how other people in our family and in the media think and feel affects us greatly. Environment, coupled with the repeated thoughts of those around us, begins to shape and mold us. And there are many moments where we get molded and don't even realize it.
 
This is why it's so important to think for yourself, renew your mind and question your beliefs on a regular basis. Many of the thoughts we think are the insecure thoughts of others. Many of the thoughts we think are the fearful thoughts of the world that we allowed to be projected onto us and then become a part of who we are, because it is reinforced so much from the outside. And it can become so loud, so consistent and so normal, that we don't even know we are being hypnotized by the fearful and insecure thoughts of others.
 
The great Timothy Leary said, "Think for yourself and question authority." Don't be a righteous contrarian just because, but because we want to examine and understand the beliefs we have about the world.
 
These fundamental beliefs determine our world view, which determines our actions, which determines our outcomes, which determine our life experience.
 
We want to make it our goal to have a beginner's mind, or to think like a child. That is to say, allow ourselves and those around us to think new thoughts and, as a result, be reborn as new people.
 
When we allow ourselves this newness and allow this for others in our lives, we step into a realm of self-directed and self-approved choices to surrender our will to the will of The Uni-verse, which makes certain things now possible to us that before seemed impossible.
 
When we are mindful of our minds, we get to live a new life. When we accept our worthiness just as we are, we make a new experience available. When we no longer seek outside of ourselves to fill the void within ourselves, we take a step toward wholeness. This is not something that we do. This is something that we allow to come forward as a result of who we are, naturally.
 
You can set yourself free, naturally, when you realize that as you are, you are perfect, whole and complete. Nothing to be done except let that be and then act accordingly.
 
How does that feel?"

___________

"Many folks think that being Loving and being a pushover are the same thing. But they aren’t. 
Being Loving doesn’t mean that you just let people walk all over you and be “nice” all the time – far from it. Being Loving means having boundaries, standing up for what you believe in and not letting people walk all over you. There is a fine line between standing up for yourself and being a jerk. And it takes some time and some mistakes to understand the difference.
 
Being a Loving person doesn’t mean you are a wet noodle. It doesn’t mean you acquiesce to the demands of others. Love has many faces. Some of them are kindness, beauty, compassion and patience and sometimes the face of Love is bold, firm and brave. Every moment is different, but if you ask the question, “What would Love do now?” you’ll get the answer.
 
There are times when Love takes to the streets in protest. There are times when Love says, “this far and no further.”
 
There are times when Love says, “I’m not going to let you treat me this way anymore.” And there are times when Love says, “Enough is enough!”
 
Many times we think that to be Loving means that we have to let other people walk all over us. And that’s just not true. I used to think that being Loving meant that I could never rock the boat. But I’ve come to understand that sometimes we HAVE to rock the boat in order to fulfill our purpose of being the Presence of Love on the planet.
 
Being Loving does not mean you are weak – au contraire! Being Loving means that you are STRONG! Strong in your conviction, strong in your compassion, strong in your vulnerability and strong in your forgiveness.
 
This is also not a hall pass to be a jerk! It’s actually a call to be strong – to stand up for what you believe in and to know that you are worthy of having the life that your heart desires. This is not permission to be mean to others, no, but it also not permission to tolerate injustice and foul play.
 
We were sent to be the Presence of Love on the planet, with an open heart, with high standards and with infinite compassion.
 
There is a balance between the stern and the soft. Know that a backbone is much more important than a wishbone!"
__________________


"You know, if you think about it, there will ALWAYS be a reason to wait for change. Not this week, there’s too much stuff going on. And next week, well, I’m traveling next week so I can’t start then. Oh, and the week after that – it’s my birthday, so I’ll wait. Next thing you know, excuse after excuse, we have made up our minds to not change for a month, two months, or maybe even more!
 
We will always find what we go looking for. And if we want to find excuses that hold us back from transformation, we will find TONS! Yes – TONS! They are everywhere. And many of us have a group of friends who don’t want to change, too – who will back us up with our excuses. Who we hang out with is who we become.
 
The environment we live in molds us more than anything else.
 
We have to be super mindful of the people we surround ourselves with and where we choose to exist and be. There are plenty of people in the world who will positively affirm mediocrity! Not because they are bad people, no – but because they do not know any better.
 
For most people, excuses not to change are commonplace and socially acceptable. But if you are on The Path and ready for transformation, excuses are just another form of resistance that is holding you back! If you want to argue for your limitations, you will justify and further create them!
 
But that is not who you ARE! That is not where you want to LIVE!
 
Mediocrity is not your emotional home! It’s a cliché, but it’s true that if we seek, we shall find. So today, instead of seeking reasons and excuses NOT to change – start to look for reasons why you should change and get motivated.
 
It’s moments like this when it’s important to GET REAL with yourself. Not so you judge yourself, but so you can see the truth of how things are – and when we see the truth, we begin to set ourselves free. And when we do that, we start to make positive change.
 
Are you in denial about your weight? (This excludes anyone who has a hormone imbalance, but for most people that’s not the case). Instead of calling yourself big boned or ignoring the problem entirely, get real with yourself – YOU’RE FAT! Accept it, and then DO something about it. How much longer do you want to live there?
 
Are you spending too much money – money that you don’t have?
 
It’s time to knock it off, face your bills and get real with a budget. Stop hiding from your bills.
 
Are you addicted to being angry or sad? Do you get connection and Love from people by telling your sad story over and over again – but deep down you know it’s time to change? It’s time to accept what happened and give what happened an empowering meaning. And know that you can get your needs met in healthier ways.
 
Are you drinking or smoking too much? How is that habit affecting your health and the health of those around you? You say you can stop at any time. Well if that’s the case – why not stop now? How much longer do you want to avoid your feelings and push them down with an addiction that isn’t serving you?
 
Maybe you are in a relationship with someone who you KNOW isn’t good for you – but you are terrified of letting go and facing the unknown alone. Yet, you know this situation won’t get any better. So you settle for 10% Love that has turned into poison, instead of letting go and facing the fear of being alone. Do you Love yourself enough to let go of this toxic situation, feel your feelings and trust the Uni-verse that a miracle is around the corner once you let go? You deserve MORE than this!
 
Begin to surround yourself with people who lift you up. We gotta love negative people, but sometimes it’s okay to love them from a distance when we are in recovery or in the beginning stages of transformation.
 
From today forward, let’s not justify our excuses. From today forward, let’s get real with ourselves and see how we are truly acting and use the white hot pain of that truth as ammunition to change our lives. How much longer do you want to live like this?
 
Some gnarly stuff may have gone down in the past, but today is a new day and today YOU have the power of choice. How do you want to view what happened? Who are you choosing to surround yourself with and where? And from this moment forward what are you going to do about it, every-single-day? You will surely arrive one year from now – the question is where, with whom and in what state?
 
Are you ready for change?"
__________________

"I’m paraphrasing, but one of my favorite authors, Caroline Myss, in one of my favorite books, Sacred Contracts, said that the most powerful human quality is choice. She says that choice is actually more powerful than Love because we get to CHOOSE to BE LOVE. Love is not a state of happiness all the time. Love is a dedication to see and Love the light and the dark. Not just be on a chemical high in the early stages of romance. Love is a verb and we get to choose TO Love.
 
This brings me to the topic of today, which is choice.
Many mystical teachings will tell you that you are 100% responsible for your circumstances. Now – I’m not sure I am totally on board with that assessment because it’s hard to think about starving children and believe that they chose that, or that someone would “choose” to be violated or taken advantage of or worse. I think life is a combination of events, outside of our control, happening, plus our taking independent action to change the events, or the meaning of the events, to empower us.
 
So, I’m not going to say that we are 100% responsible for the events of our lives. But I will say that we are at least 80% responsible for the circumstances of our lives, and that boils down to choice. Sure, crazy things happen, sometimes even “evil” things happen; but once they happen, how WE deal with them will determine the outcome. And every moment we are choosing our way into the next moment, and in every moment, as things happen we are giving those events a meaning. And when we become aware of the fact that we are choosing ourselves into every moment and that our minds are the meaning makers of our lives, we get to see the MAJOR role we play in how our lives turn out.
 
Sure, tragedies happen. But some people thrive afterwards and some don’t. Why? It’s because each person gave the event a different meaning. Some people have abusive parents and then become abusive parents. Some people have abusive parents and then never abuse their children because they don’t want them to go through the same torment.
 
Throughout our lives, many of us will face circumstances that seem unfair, painful and traumatic. And, in the moment, that is true. But as we grow and evolve, we get to see that once we accept what happened, we now have the power of choice to be able to redefine the meaning of the event. Was it GRACE or was it a disaster? Was is the worst thing that happened to you or was it an amazing lesson? Was it a tragedy or an opportunity for you to be able to see how Loving you can be? Was it a dark chapter in your life or was it that the events had to happen in order for you to discover your Light?
 
When we realize we are the meaning makers of our lives, it doesn’t mean that everything was/is or will be hunky dory. But it does mean that we can accept and eventually rise above our circumstances because we realize at our essence we are a Soul that is unlimited and that we have the power to CHOOSE how we are going to respond, interpret and live our lives.
 
Remember, I said, gnarly sh*t happens and until the human race evolves collectively to a point where we see how INSANE some of our actions are, those of us who are on The Path can rise above this insanity and start being the presence of Love on the planet that we were born to be.
 
So, if you are the meaning maker of your life, if choice is the most important quality of human behavior, what meanings are you giving the events of your life and what are you choosing to create? And would you like to change that?"

______________

"A [reader] recently emailed me and asked about forgiveness. How do we do it? Why do we do it? 

And what goes into this whole forgiveness thing anyway?
 
Well, first let me say that of all the tools and principles in the personal growth shed, forgiveness is the most important of them. You might ask, isn’t Love the most important – well, yes, but to forgive, one must Love. Forgiveness is the quintessential lesson that we are asked to learn on The Path. And, because of that, it’s also the hardest.
 
You see, forgiveness is one of those things that can only happen after something REALLY intense and negative has gone down.
 
Forgiveness isn’t a lesson we learn with a smile on our face. In order to TRULY be able to forgive, we must first be betrayed, either by ourselves or by someone else. And when that happens, unless you are an enlightened Master, there’s a forgiveness curve that begins. Some folks never complete their forgiveness curve – they hold onto a grudge until they die. And that is the worst kind of life; a life lived in the constant and perpetual pain of wishing the past could be different than it was – an impossible wish   and also a really great excuse NOT to grow.
 
The Forgiveness Arc starts with accepting and coming to terms with what happened. Depending on the nature of the event, this may be very easy or very hard. Many times we push down things we don’t want to remember, but when we do that, they tend to pop up in all kinds of weird ways. First we must accept that it happened. This doesn’t make it right, but it does put us in touch with the truth.
 
After we accept what happened, then we must step into feeling the feelings we feel, and not doing anything about them. And knowing that we are not a bad person for feeling this way – it’s totally normal and natural to feel negative feelings around an event that requires forgiveness. We give full expression to the pain through journaling, through therapy/life coaching and through meditation/yoga and the like. First we accept, then we feel – without making our feelings wrong.
 
Then, we give expression to our feelings. This could be writing it out, journaling, prayer – all those things help us to express the emotions. As we begin to do this, we step out of the certainty of anger and embrace the uncertainty of the sadness that is below the anger – and we express it.
 
If we do not begin to reframe what happened, then we will go back into anger and begin a vicious loop of anger into sadness into anger into sadness. That loop will continue until we step into the next phase – which I call Forgiveness A.
 
Forgiveness A is where we are willing to forgive whoever hurt us – this includes forgiving ourselves. This doesn’t make what they did right, but it does begin to free us from the pain and sadness cycle. We forgive them, not for them and not to let them off the hook, but to free ourselves. After a while, if we do not do this, we are actually letting them win by holding onto the pain. The best way to get back at someone who hurt you is to forgive him or her, because then you get to take your power back and they no longer hold dominion over your life.
 
As we step into Forgiveness A, life gets better. We are beginning to move on. It’s not as bad as it used to be – the charge is less.
 
And most people stay in Forgiveness A, which is totally fine and perfect. And if you can get here, that is a MAJOR win.
 
But Forgiveness B... that is the place that is the hardest to get to, yet it's the most rewarding – and the most confronting.
 
Forgiveness B takes forgiveness to a whole new level. Forgiveness B is the level of forgiveness on which Jesus, Buddha and the like practiced forgiveness. And it’s hard. Level B Forgiveness asks us not only to forgive those who hurt us, but also to Love them. And see that, from their point of view, they are in tremendous pain and their act against us was just a very messed up request for Love. So, we step into Loving those that hurt us. This doesn’t mean they have to become out best friends; we can Love them from a distance, but if we get here – we are totally free. And we can express our forgiveness to those who have hurt us most – which will help to set them free as well. Because they are still suffering from the event, just as you are.
 
And when we step into Forgiveness B, we also see that what we once thought was a horrible event, we now see as Grace, and an event that shaped our lives in a way that – even though it was extremely difficult – was a part of our lives that happened to help us grow. When we can see events that hurt us as Grace, then we are totally free and nothing will ever be able to touch us again.
 
Wherever you are on the Forgiveness Arc, it’s okay and perfect for this moment. One of the worst things we can do is try to rush this process. Forgiveness is an acceptance process and it is very personal.
 
The one thing I would like to share is that when we get there, we have totally gotten the best kind of revenge we could ever imagine – because we are living a life that is no longer touched by the negative ghosts of the past! So, don’t forgive for them, forgive for you!
 
Are you ready to get the sweetest kind of revenge?"

______________

"Fear is a compass telling you where to go....a call-to-action. Courage is taking action in the face of fear."

---------------------
"Relationships – they come, they go – some stick with us for a whole lifetime – others are around for just a lesson in time. Same thing goes for partnerships, too. And many times, we miss the message of the relationship or partnership and continue to create the same thing over and over again with new people.
 
And we end up asking the same ole question, “Why did this happen to me... AGAIN!?”
 
Well, finding out the answer to that question isn’t as easy as one blog post on The Daily Love. However, I do want to share with you a very interesting insight that might take some of the resentment out of your current relationships and, perhaps, shine a light on previous ones.
 
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – one of the core tenets of TDL is that RELATIONSHIPS ARE CONTAINERS FOR GROWTH. If you grow, learn and otherwise evolve from any relationship you’re in or you’ve had, it’s not a failure!
 
One of the ways for us to grow while we are in or striving for a relationship/partnership is this:
 
Whatever you admire, Love or look up to in someone is a part of yourself that you have not yet cultivated that is asking to be called forth. Basically, what you see in someone else is yourself seeing itself and wanting to be cultivated.
 
That is to say, what we Love about other people are parts of us that we haven’t yet discovered. 
 
It’s a little heady, which is why I said it three different ways!
 
So – if we do not cultivate the parts of ourselves that we admire in others, we can start to build resentment and anger toward them.
 
This explains why, in the beginning of a relationship, we Love certain qualities about someone, but later on, we end up resenting the same qualities.
 
They go from being so “artistic” to “crazy and never on time” or they go from having a great “work ethic” to “never having enough time for me.” This isn’t a blanket statement though. It’s something to check in with your intuition about.
 
What do you, or DID you Love/admire and adore in your partner that now really pisses you off, or gets under your skin? This doesn’t have to be for just a relationship; this could be for a business partnership or a friendship, too.
 
What did you admire about them in the beginning? Or is there a role model or celebrity out in the world that you Love? What about them is so awesome? What qualities about them make you come alive? Realize that you possess that SAME quality and it is asking to be expressed.
 
So, if you want to find more balance in your relationship, partnership or friendship, try this out.
 
Each person makes a list about what they admire about the other person. Make the list, check it over and then share it with each other. Then support each other in becoming what’s on that list.
 
If you love how creative the other person is, how will you develop your own creativity? If you admire how hard they work, can you step it up in your own life? Doing this will help us grow and help our relationships find balance again. And hopefully we will stop being mad at other people for what we haven’t created yet in ourselves."

- The Daily Love

"Be not the slave of your own past-  
plunge into the sublime seas, dive deep,  
and swim far, so you shall come back with self-respect, with new power, with an advanced experience, that shall explain and overlook the old." 
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

“I postpone death by living, by suffering, by error, by risking, by giving, by losing.”
- Anaïs Nin
 
“Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.”
- The Dalai Lama
 
“When I chased after money, I never had enough. When I got my life on purpose and focused on giving of myself and everything that arrived into my life, then I was prosperous.”
- Wayne Dyer

“Humility is recognition of truth. Your worldly accomplishments are a gift bestowed upon you by the Uni-verse, nothing is possible without the support of the invisible realm of the Infinite Mystery. When you know that you actually do nothing and are simply a channel for the Good, Abundance, Joy and Peace that already existed before your birth to be rearranged to your preference you will be in harmony with Life. The minute you buy into being the doer of anything you have taken yourself out of the flow and stepped back into Ego thinking. All things have been created by the Joyful will of the Infinite Mystery, Life is an experience of making choices about how you want to arrange things in your life. You can choose to arrange things in a Fearful, Egoic way, or you can choose to arrange things in a Loving and Joyful way. When you choose Love and Joy you align with the greatest and highest Good and begin to express your unique creative perspective while at the same time feeling a oneness with everyone else. This will leave you with a feeling of wholeness, joy, peace and gratitude.” 
- Jackson Kiddard

“Tell me what a person finds sexually attractive and I will tell you their entire philosophy of life. Show me the person they sleep with and I will tell you their valuation of themselves.”
-Ayn Rand

"Without a spiritual practice everyday, we can become lost and so attached to what happens that we get lost in the world."
- The Daily Love

"Asking is the beginning of receiving. Make sure you don't go to the ocean with a teaspoon. At least take a bucket so the kids won't laugh at you." 
- Jim Rohn

“The price tag that you put on your soul will determine the people and circumstances in which you find yourself.”
 - Shannon L. Alder

“The measure of intelligence is the ability to change.”
 - Albert Einstein

"Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit."
- Peter Ustinov

“I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious Ambiguity.”
 - Gilda Radner

"Life is a succession of lessons, which must be lived to be understood." 
- Ralph Waldo Emerson 

"Love is the SPACE that allows free will to happen, which includes fear. 

I have a question: In your ideal scene for a partner, do you imagine him or her being in another relationship or not available to you emotionally? If that is what you would put on your vision board, then yes, this is the person for you. But chances are, none of us would ever want to be with an emotionally unavailable person.
 
So why do we choose to do this? I've been addicted to emotionally unavailable people before and it totally sucks.
 
We do this 'cuz the 10% of the Love and attention we are getting helps us feel less shitty. Without that 10% Love, we would get 0% Love, and 10% is better than 0%. And deep down we have a fear that we don't deserve Love, and that we must hold onto this small amount we are getting from someone who isn't even really available to us.
 
On paper, 10% seems better than 0%, if 0% is your reference point. But you see, The Uni-verse wants us to be FULFILLED.
 
That doesn't mean 100% happy all the time, but what it does mean is that It wants us to FULLY experience the ups and downs of a relationship with an emotionally available person.
 
This means feeling that 100% Love is possible, with hopefully an average around 90% most of the time. When our reference point is 90-100% of the Love you want, why oh why would we put up with 10%? Easy - 'cuz we are scared of the unknown and assume the worst. We don't think highly of ourselves when we are in that frame of mind, and we are operating from low self-esteem and a lack consciousness. So we cling to 10% for dear life.
 
Today I would like to invite us to set a new standard and let go of the 10%. It's time to allow ourselves to drift into the scary unknown. If we let ourselves go into the unknown, work on ourselves and become the Love we are seeking, it is Love's promise that IT will FIND US. Yup, that's right. But we have to go through the dark night of our fears, dive deep into our insecurities, feel the pain of them and then bring the Light of our awareness to them. We humbly ask The Uni-verse to remove our low self-esteem day by day and ask It to show us what Love is. Our goal is to Love ourselves as we are Loved by The Uni-verse, which is a lot. This kind of Love Loves our light and our dark and is constantly purifying the darkness into light.
 
As we do this, we desire to put up with less bull, and instead embrace a higher standard for Love. And as we embrace this higher standard, we WILL be sent someone who meets that higher standard, not in our time, but in the perfect time.
 
So, can you let go today? Can you let go of that measly 10% and step out into the unknown? I know it's scary, but in that unknown are your dreams and that BIG LOVE that you want.

So many seekers block their own natural intuition because they are afraid. And they don't take action. They don't leave the job, or the relationship or start their own business. They don't leap into the arms of The Divine with the trust that they will be caught or learn how to fly. They block their intuition and then life shuts down.
 
Other times, we take too much action and run around like a chicken with our head cut off. And this is because we are not listening.
 
The key is to learn how to trust yourself. And whatever you are being told to do, whatever you are being guided to do, have the courage to do it. OR if you are being guided to rest, stop and wait - have the willingness and humility to LISTEN and trust what you hear.
 
If we don't trust ourselves, we will never create the life of our dreams. We will never self-actualize and we will always live a life that is in service to the opinions and beliefs of OTHER PEOPLE. This is NOT our destiny. Our destiny is to live a Self-Approved life in harmony with The Uni-verse where we claim our Divine birthright and ACT on our faith - every day. And as we do, expect and allow miracles and synchronicities to show up in the most amazing way!

So, I must ask myself what would I rather listen to, The Divine or my own mind?
 
Well, I can tell you that my own mind has almost killed me with drug and alcohol addiction. And even though my mind is intelligent and clever, the wisdom that emanates from my heart is Cosmic in nature. That is to say, it's beyond the rational part of my mind. It's tapped into a Larger Perspective.
 
So my journey from this day forward is to make daily conscious contact with this part of myself and see where it leads me. I await with MUCH positive expectation!
 
We all have this ability. How can you quiet your mind and tap into the feeling and wisdom of your heart today?

Here’s to trying until you get it right – even if it takes a thousand tries.

What in your life have you made more important than your own approval? What in life have you made more important than living your purpose? What in your life have you made more important than being happy? Where have you settled and why?
 
What OUTER THING do you think is more important than trusting yourself? A person? A parent? A material possession?

I'm urging us to take a deep look at our lives and see what unhealthy and unloving habits, addictions and thoughts we can let go of. Not because it's so painful, but because we know that in doing so, we will liberate ourselves to live alongside a higher order of things.It’s incredible how much time, energy and money we spend to not feel.
 
Think about it. What do you do when those feelings that you don’t want to feel come up?
 
A lot of folks I know numb their feelings through: withdrawal, eating, drinking, sleeping, spending money, watching mindless TV, faffing on the internet and getting into arguments on Facebook – just to pass the time and not feel.

Stop trying to solve your problems with your mind. Give Love room to step in and help guide you. When you do this, you will be led to the strangest and most beautiful of places....Whatever it may be, whatever you feel Love is guiding you to do, jump in."

- The Daily Love

"You will see how far in life you'll go with the 5 people you spend the most amount of time with."
- Will Smith

"There is overwhelming evidence that the higher the level of self-esteem, the more likely one will treat others with respect, kindness, and generosity. People who do not experience self-love have little or no capacity to love others."
 - Nathaniel Branden, is a psychotherapist and writer

"What a man thinks of himself, that is what determines, or rather indicates, his fate."
- Henry David Thoreau

"No man is defeated without until he has first been defeated within."
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Overcome ANY Obstacle with 3 Simple Questions
by Jack Canfield

"What stands between you and what you most desire?

Your answers might relate to a lack of money, time, support from family, or all of these. Obstacles can seem so numerous, so obvious, and so tough to change.

You can relate to obstacles in many ways. Typical responses are to explain them or resist them.

Both responses take a lot of time and energy. And both anchor you firmly in the past, keeping your focus on areas of your life that are not working.

To immediately generate alternatives, remember a simple analogy...

Imagine that you’re driving down a scenic highway. Suddenly you come to a huge rock in the middle of the road.

At this moment you have several options. You could try to explain how the rock ended up there. You could also go into resistance mode, complaining about the carelessness of highway construction or the lack of state funding for rock removal.

Or, you could bypass all this negativity and remove the obstacle from your life at once. Instead of explaining the rock or resisting it, just drive around it.

When faced with obstacles, people often respond with questions based on explanation and resistance, such as:
- Why am I so alone? 
- Why does this always happen to me?
- Why am I such a failure?

However, you always have another option. You can ask questions that help you drive around any obstacle in your life.

Questions have uncanny power. Questions direct your attention— and along with it, how you think and how you feel. If you want to create different thoughts, feelings, and results into your life, then ask different questions.

Start now by skipping the why questions and begin asking what questions, such as:
What’s the lesson here?
There’s an old saying about learning from experience: Beware the person with twenty years of experience. This may consist of one year of learning and nineteen years of repetition.
The point is that experiences do not come prepackaged with empowering lessons. Everything hinges on how you interpret experiences, and your interpretations can change over the years. A single event can take you a step closer to emotional contraction or expansion. It all depends on how you interpret that event.

Psychologist Martin Seligman has made a career by studying how human beings interpret their experience. He notes that each of us has an explanatory style. People who chronically feel helpless tend to explain events in ways that are:
Permanent: “I always get confused when trying to learn something new.”
Personal: “I’m just no good at meeting people.”
Pervasive: “I’m just the kind of person who fails to follow through, no matter what kind of goals I set.”

Optimistic people use a different style. They explain events in ways that are:
Temporary: “When I feel confused, I ask questions that lead me to understanding.”
External: “I find it hard to talk to people in bars, so I invite them to quiet restaurants instead.”
Specific: “I find it challenging to meet long-term goals, so for now I will focus on achieving short-term objectives.”

You should interpret these obstacles as yield signs rather than stop signs.

These are signals that the world is expanding to accommodate your growth. Instead of resisting a challenge, just lean into it. Ask yourself: How can I interpret this event in a more powerful way? What’s a positive lesson that’s waiting here to be learned?

What’s great about having this problem?
There’s an easy answer to this question: “Nothing!” However, looking beyond that knee-jerk response can quickly open up your perspective.

Tony Robbins offers an example in his book Awakening the Giant Within. He recalls a time when he’d been on the road for nearly 100 days out of 120. Returning to his office, he found a stack of urgent memos and a list of 100 phone calls that he needed to personally return. Before making these discoveries, he was tired. Now he felt exhausted.

Tony managed to shift his internal state simply by asking: What’s great about having this problem? He then realized that just a few years ago he would have been grateful to get calls from twenty people—let alone one hundred people with national reputations.

This insight was enough to break his pattern of frustration. He found himself feeling grateful that so many people he loved and respected were willing to connect with him.

What’s my next action?
This question shines a spotlight on solutions. No matter what happens, you can choose what to say and do in response. Rather than manifesting resistance or explanation, you can choose your next action.

Successful people hold a bias for action. Add inspiration and intention to the mix, and you gain an unstoppable momentum.
_______________________

"The path to self-destruction is filled with avoidance of yourself. That's what addiction really is - avoidance of ourselves to our own detriment. There are LOTS of ways to be addicted. You can be addicted to substances, alcohol, people, work, fame, success, attention, flirting with people, sugar, food and lots of other things.
 
When we hit a rough patch in life, instead of just letting ourselves feel, we can choose one of the above addictions and keep avoiding what's within us. This is not what The Uni-verse has in mind for you. No amount of chocolate, sex, alcohol, success, people or drugs can silence the Whisper of The Uni-verse within you OR your emotions.
 
So, today, instead of running, I have another suggestion. My suggestion is that it's time to stop running from The Uni-verse and your emotions and just face them. Be still. Get quiet and listen. Let yourself get angry, let yourself get sad. Face the truth; go through the eye of the needle; feel the pain and know that it will slowly fade. The short-term pain of facing a truth FAR outweighs the long-term pain of believing a lie. 
 
I have found a system that has helped me truly face my emotions and feelings instead of running from them. So I am going to give you some tips on HOW to feel your feelings and remain sane through the process:
 
1. Go 100% sober from your distraction of choice. For 30 days give up the cigarettes, the alcohol, the lover, the sugar and the chase.
 
2. Breathe - our bodies need breath in a major way. Most of us don't breathe properly and deprive our body from this life giving source. The best way I know how to fill your body up with breath is with Kundalini Yoga. Do 3 classes a week for 30 days. It will change your life.
 
3. Drink up - hydrate. Dehydration can lead to all kinds of negative side effects, including depression and low energy.
 
4. Exercise - Move your body 3-4 days a week for at least 30 minutes.
 
5. Eat an alkaline diet. This is a great way to bring your body back into alignment. I suggest reading Crazy Sexy Diet, The pH Miracle and/or The Body Ecology Diet and following them.
 
6. Write your feelings down every morning. Journal for 10-30 minutes in the AM and just let out how you feel on the page. Daily purging really helps.
 
7. Get a therapist, mentor or coach to help guide you through this process. It REALLY helps to have someone be an outside observer.
 
8. If you are addicted to drugs, food, alcohol or sex - get to a 12-step meeting for your addiction. Shared experience helps.
 
9. Only hang out with friends who uplift you. Take a break from any negative people in your life.
 
10. Write your goals down. Imagine your best life and write down what you really want your life to be like. Many of us have no clear vision of the kind of life we want to create and as a result, don't create it.
 
11. When you start to have anxiety, sadness or any "negative" emotion, instead of reaching for the pills, the sugar or the drink, just let yourself feel your feelings.
 
Love yourself through that process. Let yourself feel. It's not a bad thing to get angry, sad or to cry. It's NORMAL and human.
 
When we don't let ourselves feel, we cut ourselves off from our core and The Uni-verse. It's VITAL that you let yourself feel your feelings and not run. Remember when you're in the middle of those gnarly feelings - this too will pass - it gets better. Be brave and feel - no more running.
 
12. Hang in places of high vibrations - sacred spaces, yoga studios, nature, with awesome friends, bible studies, churches, etc. Go where the Love is.

- The Daily Love

"We pay a heavy price for our fear of failure. It is a powerful obstacle to growth. It assures the progressive narrowing of the personality and prevents exploration and experimentation. There is no learning without some difficulty and fumbling. If you want to keep on learning, you must keep on risking failure - all your life."
- John W. Gardner


"Any fact facing us is not as important as our attitude toward it, for that determines our success or failure."
 
- Norman Vincent Peale
________________

"So, this is the lesson: be of service. Solve problems. Share yourself. Step out of self-will and open yourself up to The Will of The Uni-verse. It will squeeze your ego. It will bring you through the fires of your own fears so that all that is not in alignment with your calling is burned away. But what will be left is a pristine manifestation of your core essence. Fear will be burned away. Limiting beliefs will be challenged and overcome and you will feel at home within yourself. You will see naysayers as teachers showing you how to believe in yourself even more.
 
It is our self-will and stubborn, selfish ambition that keeps the good stuff out. Ask today for all those illusions to be shattered. Have FAITH that you WILL be provided for during your purification and recalibration.
 
A decision is not a decision until you take action. What gifts are The Uni-verse asking you to express? Step into those gifts and let yourself be purified through the fire of facing your fears.
 
A greater life than you can now imagine is on the other side. Don't resist who you really are and who you're called to be. Give in, give up and let The Uni-verse show you the way.

When you trust yourself and ask more of The Uni-verse, your attraction point changes and the people in your life change as a result. Embrace being alone. Accept that it will happen in perfect time, but not necessarily on YOUR schedule.  Forgive past lovers, for they have only come bearing the gift of a lesson. When you forgive, you create more room in your life for love.
 
Feel the pain, but then step back and see the lesson.

Next time, learn from the past and make a new choice.

You are the co-creator of your life with the choices you make."

- The Daily Love
_________________

"How many of us can do that in life? Instead of demanding what we want and wanting it now, can we ask The Uni-verse for what we want, and then let go? Can we rest in the peace of the moment knowing we are provided for and that the perfect thing, which is probably better than what we asked for in the first place, will show up?
 
Do we really have the faith to live the maybe? Or better put, can we see that the delays of The Uni-verse are not Its denials? Can we let go and let things unfold naturally?

Ask for the emotional sobriety and peace of mind to be okay living the maybes. Get comfortable in the in-between. Know that delays are not denials and have fun in the moment, in the mean time, as it evolves into an ever better version of reality."
___________

"You are not a victim, but a co-creator of your life with The Uni-verse.

So here's a practice for today. Instead of focusing on someone else's potential and what's possible for them, focus on your own.
 
Focus on realizing your own potential, your own greatness.
 
Ask The Uni-verse to bring you people, places and circumstances that serve your Highest Good.
 
Don't invest in other people's illusions; let people show you who they are, right here and right now. You deserve to be seen, to be Loved fully and for your Light to be honored by the people in your life. Don't accept anything less than that."
____________

"When we love ourselves, we remember that rejection is protection. When we love ourselves, we are careful with whom we give our hearts to. When we love ourselves, we see every event of our lives as lessons and know that there are no shortages in The Uni-verse. We know that if it doesn't work out with that someone you had your eye on, or that job you really wanted, something greater is on the way.
 
When we love ourselves and are filled with this love, it's nearly impossible to feel unrequited love from someone else. It's only when we have given that person power over our lives and control over our emotional well-being that we can feel unrequited love from them. Feeling unrequited love from someone is a symptom of low self-esteem and a misalignment with your power.
 
So, if you're feeling this way, take your power back today. Put your trust in the things that The Uni-verse has in store for you. Let go a little and see what's next. There is no shortage in The Uni-verse. There is someone perfect for you out there and they will find you as you become more and more of your authentic self.
 
When you are feeling the low vibrations of unrequited love, don't go chasing after it from other people. STOP, check in within yourself and be still. If you seek out the path of trying to fill yourself up from other people or substances, you will only make it worse. Take care of yourself. Do you! Stay in your power and do things that nurture your heart and soul.
 
This is what I mean when I say, 'The only unrequited love that truly exists is towards ourselves.' When we love ourselves, we are not seeking others to fill us and we are free to detach and welcome in the perfect person in the perfect time. And in the meantime, we fill ourselves up so that we have the serenity and joy - so we can step into savoring the waiting, instead of dreading it.
 
Feeling unrequited love today? Take your power back, love yourself and watch it go away."

- The Daily Love

"Don't worry about losing. If it is right, it happens - the main thing is not to hurry. Nothing good gets away." 
 - John Steinbeck
 
"Love comes when manipulation stops; when you think more about the other person than about his or her reactions to you. When you dare to reveal yourself fully. When you dare to be vulnerable."
- Dr. Joyce Brothers

New Rules for 21st Century Business
I take lunch everyday and do something unrelated to work. For example, I get out of the office and take a walk, visit a local park, read a book, or visit with a friend.
I work reasonable hours. On most days, I arrive at _____ and leave by _____.
I schedule "breathing room" every day so I can step back, re-evaluate my priorities, and be sure that I'm working on what really matters. 
I do whatever it takes to create a healthy work environment. I keep my office free of clutter and if necessary, I use a clean air filter, full spectrum lighting, and keep a reserve of fresh water nearby. 
I have an "Absolute Yes" list for work (a 3" x 5" index card with my top five priorities listed in order of importance) and I refer to it often. 
I train myself to consistently look for ways to delegate work in order to empower others while I honor my Absolute Yes list.
I hire only highly competent, talented people to support my efforts. 
I ask family and friends to honor my work time by eliminating non-essential personal calls and interruptions.
I coordinate my work schedule to remove distractions and interruptions. For example, I design blocks of uninterrupted, focused time; I turn the ringer off on the phone; and check voicemail and e-mail at pre-planned times (only when necessary). 
I refuse to participate in gossip, drama, or complaining.  The moment I hear or see it happening, I leave the room. 
I stop taking on more than I can handle. When asked to take on a project, I check to be sure I can complete the assignment without suffering or sacrificing my self-care. 
_____________

"Also, because we don’t know what’s going to happen next in our lives, it is Spiritually incorrect to assume the worst when you perceive chaos happening in your life. The Uni-verse speaks in chaos, change and Grace many times appears to be chaos, and right before revelation is usually some form of ego death.

What does that mean?
 
It means that for us to understand and come into harmony with greater Truths about ourselves and The Uni-verse, our old perceptions AND fears have to be shed (aka die) for new insight to come. Knowing this cycle can be SO helpful when you are going about the business of manifesting your dreams, creating a loving relationship or simply just signing up for the adventure that should be your life.
 
When you lean into your faith (both in yourself and in The Uni-verse), you invite chaos (aka a higher order of living) into your life. It is part of our calling on The Path to develop emotional fitness and proper insight to see that when things “seem” to be going “wrong” or “changing”, not to freak out and apply some doomsday meaning to these events of our lives. Instead, we step back, observe and know that in any seeming change, crisis or chaos is both potential risk AND potential opportunity.
 
It is those of us who have trained our mind to see and trust the bigger picture (knowing that The Uni-verse is FOR us and never against us) that benefit most from change, chaos and crisis. It is Spiritually backwards to ask for an easy life that works out perfectly AND desire faith in yourself and The Uni-verse. Faith counts the MOST when the sh*t is hitting the fan."
______________________________

"The bottom line is this: we must be willing to try new things if we are going to grow. And if we are going to try new things, we gotta be ok with our new ideas not working at first - and then we gotta keep the faith that as we keep trying, tweaking and learning - something awesome will come from it.

So - what new things are you trying? Are you scared that you made a mistake? How can you learn from the mistake, keep trying new things until you get it right? Maybe in your health, relationships, job, career or romance?"

- The Daily Love
______________________________

"Thought is cause: experience is effect.  If you don't like the effects in your life, you have to change the nature of your thinking."

- Marianne Williamson

"All of the Great Teachers throughout the history of our species have merely taught one thing, over and over, in whatever language, at whatever time. All have said, simply: Give up weak attractors for strong attractors."
 
- David Hawkins
 
"Ask how you'd live your life differently if you knew you were going to die soon, then ask yourself who those people you admire are and why you admire them, and then ask yourself what was the most fun time in your life. The answers to these questions, when seen, heard, and felt, provide us with an open doorway into our mission, our destiny, our purpose."
 
- Thom Hartmann
 
"The choice to follow love through to its completion is the choice to seek completion within ourselves. The point at which we shut down on others is the point at which we shut down on life. We heal as we heal others, and we heal others by extending our perceptions past their weaknesses. Until we have seen someone's darkness, we don't really know who that person is. Until we have forgiven someone's darkness, we don't really know what love is. Forgiving others is the only way to forgive ourselves, and forgiveness is our greatest need."
 
- Marianne Williamson

"Our natural ability to reason plus the intuition we were born with are invaluable tools that can help to bring us out of undesired circumstances.

One major issue that holds a lot of Seekers back is the belief that they are not worthy to receive something better. Before anything of greater value can come into our lives we must begin to believe we are worthy of people, circumstances and a life that has greater value. If we are keeping ourselves stuck in an abusive or toxic relationship, what will begin to change that is our thoughts and belief that we are worthy of happiness within our relationships.

If we lack the financial abundance we desire, the belief that we are more valuable is core to changing our situation. Once we have the thoughts and beliefs of greater self-esteem, then we can begin to take action.

It is in our thoughts of unworthiness that we create a life that is out of harmony with what we truly desire. Slowly, day by day, as we change our thoughts from unworthiness to worthiness, from doubting our dreams and intuition to believing, we will begin to take subtle different actions. These actions will eventually add up one at a time until we don't even recognize our life anymore.

We all want something to change in our lives. We want to grow.

We want to evolve. We want love. We desire abundance.

We must begin by acknowledging our worth. We are not worthy because of a degree, an honor or a grade. We are all equally worthy to live this kind of elevated lifestyle because we are all Loved children of The Uni-verse. We must each realize that we are already worthy and then begin to take action from this place of already being worthy, while at the same time honor the worthiness of everyone else we meet.

Your job is to become strong enough to see and experience the fear and negativity of others and, instead of resisting it and calling it "evil" or "dark", to understand it is simply a deep yearning for love. When you understand and know that another's fearful and negative state of being is nothing more than a call for love, you no longer have to assume their fear or let it affect you. You can simply understand what they are really looking for and send Love instead of fear back to them.

When we understand that the fear and negativity in others is a call for Love, we inoculate ourselves against the fear bug. We have an anti-fear-otic that, through our awareness, transforms fear into Love within us. This way, we can purge our bodies of the fear of others and actually respond from a place that not only helps to elevate and heal them, but also elevates and heals us in the process."

__________________________

"Your job is to become strong enough to see and experience the fear and negativity of others and, instead of resisting it and calling it "evil" or "dark", to understand it is simply a deep yearning for love. When you understand and know that another's fearful and negative state of being is nothing more than a call for love, you no longer have to assume their fear or let it affect you. You can simply understand what they are really looking for and send Love instead of fear back to them.
 
When we understand that the fear and negativity in others is a call for Love, we inoculate ourselves against the fear bug. We have an anti-fear-otic that, through our awareness, transforms fear into Love within us. This way, we can purge our bodies of the fear of others and actually respond from a place that not only helps to elevate and heal them, but also elevates and heals us in the process."

 - The Daily Love


Choose people who are open to love.
 
That's right, I said it. Choose people who are open to love.
Sounds obvious, doesn't it? Well I'll be the first to admit that I have altered, changed, obsessed and thought about how to act around people I like so they won't reject me. Another way of looking at this is: I stopped being ME to please someone else.
 
This is messed up in two ways:
 
1. I would abandon myself to make someone else happy (#fail).
 
2. The person I was pretending to be would be who the other person would like, not the real me (#fail).
 
So when we do this, and we all do, we let ourselves down and actually lie to the other person, too. So when we are finally our real selves, the other person is shocked to find out the truth.
 
The answer is simple, but not easy: be radically yourself. (Tweet-worthy!)
 
Don't abandon yourself to please another. Open up, be a dork (yes, I am projecting), be a little crazy, be sweet, kind, generous and all those things you wish to have in someone else.
 
You see, many times we hold back these previous things because we think we will turn off or offend the other person... But the truth is, we should be open and ourselves and celebrate when people reject us. Because they AIN'T open to our love.
 
We want someone who is open, willing and excited to receive what we have to give. Just like they want someone who is excited, open and willing to receive what they have to give.
 
The bottom line: don't close down, shut off or tone yourself down because you think the other person will reject you. If they aren't attracted to who you really are, then good, time saved and you can move on. Lingering in a false identity to get the approval of someone else is the ultimate betrayal of your personal integrity. We do it because we love approval from other people. The only problem is that we are building our house on a bed of sand. It will tumble eventually and the truth will be exposed.
 
So today and every day forward, let's have no fear to be ourselves. Let's make a pact to be radically ourselves and let the chips fall where they may. The right person will stick, but only if you have the courage, clarity and self-love to let go of the wrong one.
 
Be you out loud today. I dare you.

 - The Daily Love


We all hit bumps in the road of life. I am a big believer that it’s not how hard you fall, but how high you bounce back.
 
I have written a lot (because it’s SO important) about how the only thing we can really control in our lives is our perception of the events of our lives. We have influence over some things in our lives, but mostly we are powerless to control much. That is why attitude and perception are everything.

So when you hit a road bump, when you get thrown off, when you get depressed – what do we do? HOW do we bounce back?

Well, some of us don’t want to bounce back. Some of us would rather keep suppressing our emotions and working on ourselves, so these folks keep stuffing down parts of themselves that are dying to be seen, recognized and expressed. The path to self-destruction is filled with avoidance of yourself. That’s what addiction really is – avoidance of ourselves to our own detriment. There are LOTS of ways to be addicted. You can be addicted to substances, alcohol, people, work, fame, success, attention, flirting with people, sugar, food and lots of other things.

When we hit a rough patch in life, instead of just letting ourselves feel, we can choose one of the above addictions and keep avoiding what’s within us. This is not what The Uni-verse has in mind for you. No amount of chocolate, sex, alcohol, success, people or drugs can silence the Whisper of The Uni-verse within you OR your emotions.

So, today, instead of running, I have another suggestion. My suggestion is that it’s time to stop running from The Uni-verse and your emotions and just face them. Be still. Get quiet and listen. Let yourself get angry, let yourself get sad. Face the truth; go through the eye of the needle; feel the pain and know that it will slowly fade. The short-term pain of facing a truth FAR outweighs the long-term pain of believing a lie. (Tweet-worthy!) 


I have found a system that has helped me truly face my emotions and feelings instead of running from them. So I am going to give you some tips on HOW to feel your feelings and remain sane through the process:

1. Go 100% sober from your distraction of choice. For 30 days give up the cigarettes, the alcohol, the lover, the sugar and the chase.

2. Breathe – our bodies need breath in a major way. Most of us don’t breathe properly and deprive our body from this life giving source. The best way I know how to fill your body up with breath is with Kundalini Yoga. Do 3 classes a week for 30 days. It will change your life.

3. Drink up – hydrate. Dehydration can lead to all kinds of negative side effects, including depression and low energy. Drink 1 liter of ALKALINE water for every 40 lbs you weigh.

4. Exercise – Move your body 3-4 days a week for at least 30 minutes.

5. Eat an alkaline diet. This is a great way to bring your body back into alignment. I suggest reading Crazy Sexy Diet, The pH Miracle and/or The Body Ecology Diet and following them.

6. Write your feelings down every morning. Journal for 10-30 minutes in the AM and just let out how you feel on the page. Daily purging really helps.

7. Get a therapist, mentor or coach to help guide you through this process. It REALLY helps to have someone be an outside observer.

8. If you are addicted to drugs, food, alcohol or sex – get to a 12-step meeting for your addiction. Shared experience helps.

9. Only hang out with friends who uplift you. Take a break from any negative people in your life.

10. Write your goals down. Imagine your best life and write down what you really want your life to be like. Many of us have no clear vision of the kind of life we want to create and as a result, don’t create it.

11. When you start to have anxiety, sadness or any “negative” emotion, instead of reaching for the pills, the sugar or the drink, just let yourself feel your feelings. Love yourself through that process. Let yourself feel. It’s not a bad thing to get angry, sad or to cry.

It’s NORMAL and human. When we don’t let ourselves feel, we cut ourselves off from our core and The Uni-verse. It’s VITAL that you let yourself feel your feelings and not run. Remember when you’re in the middle of those gnarly feelings – this too will pass – it gets better. Be brave and feel – no more running.

12. Hang in places of high vibrations – sacred spaces, yoga studios, nature, with awesome friends, bible studies, churches, etc. Go where the Love is.

I hope these tips help you break through. These are some of the most powerful tools I know to connect back to who you really are, to be able to hear The Uni-verse and stay sane in the process.

 - The Daily Love

"Criticism, like rain, should be gentle enough to nourish a man's growth without destroying his roots." 
 
– Frank A. Clark


"'Turn Your Mess Into A Message...'
 
My friend Don Nash said that to me… I think it’s genius.
 
The most important part of life, and the only part of life that we can truly control, is our perception. We may have influence over other parts of our life, but the only thing we have 100% control over is how we CHOOSE to perceive the events of our lives.
 
One of the FUNdamental messages of TDL is that you are not a victim, but a co-creator of your life with The Uni-verse.
 
It’s easy to play the victim, and a lot of people out there will try to convince you that it’s easier to blame other people for the circumstances of your life. One of the reasons it’s easy to be a victim is because you give away the response-ability of the outcome and circumstances of your life to some other person or entity.
 
As a victim, we tell ourselves that it’s not our fault; it’s the government’s fault, or our significant other's fault, or our friend’s fault or our parents’ fault. If you really get creative you can imagine a whole range of people to blame for your life.
 
But the truth is that you are the one making the choices in your life. YOU have the free will and ability to CHOOSE to connect to Love, or not.
 
If you’re like me, you’ve probably made a mistake or two in your life (or dozens… lol). For a long time it was easy to blame people for the outcome. When things didn’t go the way I WANTED them to I would just make it someone else’s fault.
 
But, I started to learn differently. Thanks to teachers like Caroline Myss, Wayne Dyer, Tony Robbins, M.Scott Peck, Jan Shepherd, Sophie Chiche and most recently Jesus, I began to learn how to take my power back. I began to see that the way we thrive is by making our INNER WORLD stronger than the outer world.
 
Tony Robbins will tell you that the story you tell yourself about your life will dictate the outcome of it. Caroline Myss reminds us that CHOICE is the most important power in The Uni-verse. Dr. Dyer teaches that it is the power of your INTENTION that forms the outcome of your life. Mr. Peck will tell you that life is hard and that when you realize and accept that, life is no longer hard. Jan would tell you to put the loving first and to keep your dreams and visions grounded and in real time. And Sophie would remind us to love ourselves big time and to keep our thoughts in alignment with what we want, rather than what we don’t want. And of course, the big JC teaches unconditional Love and says we can experience this Love when we have right thought, take right action and keep our focus off of ourselves and keep it instead on Love.
 
How could you possibly let yourself be a victim knowing all these things?
 
If you really get that these lessons are REAL and TRUE and WORK, then, if you’re like me, you will feel called to turn your mess into a message.
 
Add value to other people’s lives and value will be added to your own. (Tweet-worthy!) Being of service and taking the wounds of your life and turning them into lessons and sharing your experience with others will do more good to you and the planet than almost anything else.
 
To be human is to be messy, to screw up and to not get it right - that just comes with the territory. But it’s not right thought or action to assume the role of the victim. It may seem safer and it may even seem true. But what’s true is that you can take the wounds, messes and tragedies of your life and use them for good.
 
You can take your power back from people, groups and anything else that says you are powerless. You are POWERFUL, but you have to choose to be in your power and to step up.
 
Keep your thoughts on Love. Take and assume response-ability for your life. Things may have happened in your past that you have no control over. But what you DO have control over is how you respond to those events. Do you want to let those events get the best of you, or do you want to rise to the occasion, pick yourself up by the bootstraps and say, “I got this!”
 
You may not have been able to control what happened in the past, but you have 100% control over what you CHOOSE to believe and, as a result, where you go from here."

- The Daily Love

"If, for some strange reason, you have or still keep attracting lovers who only end up causing you pain, today’s words are for you.
 
Each person in your life is sent there for your benefit and to teach you a lesson. The lesson could be how to trust yourself. The lesson could be that you are loved. The lesson could be to heal a wound from your past, or perhaps, the lesson could be forgiveness.
 
Now, think about this. If someone is sent into your life to teach you forgiveness, how else could you learn the lesson of forgiveness than by being betrayed or let down by someone you care for deeply? Or, if the lesson is to teach you how to trust yourself, then how else could you learn except by getting into a relationship where you KNEW from the beginning that is wasn’t good for you, but you proceeded anyway?
 
Some lessons come bearing pain; others come bearing great pleasure and reward. (Tweet-worthy!) YOUR task is to see the people who are coming in and out of your life from a larger perspective and ask yourself what you are learning from each person. YOU have consciously or unconsciously chosen who the people are in your life.
 
As a result, you are either consciously or unconsciously signing up for a lesson from each person you allow into your life experience. If you keep choosing people to fill your life experience who you know deep down aren’t healthy for you, but that being with them is better than being alone, then you are signing up for a painful lesson, AGAIN, about how to trust yourself.
 
You will keep attracting people into your life who leave that painful aftertaste until you start to trust yourself. Then, slowly but surely, your life will begin to change.
 
When you trust yourself and ask more of The Uni-verse, your attraction point changes and the people in your life change as a result.
 
If you want to attract that loving person, then ask more from The Uni-verse.
 
Embrace being alone. Accept that it will happen in perfect time, but not necessarily on YOUR schedule.  Forgive past lovers, for they have only come bearing the gift of a lesson.
 
When you forgive, you create more room in your life for BIG LOVE.
 
Feel the pain, but then step back and see the lesson. Next time, learn from the past and make a new choice.
 
You are the co-creator of your life with the choices you make."

____________________

"

I’ve spent a lot of time asking the question, “Who am I?”
 
And I’ve come up with all kinds of answers. I’m a person. I’m a writer. I’m a teacher. I’m a boyfriend. I’m an entrepreneur.
 
Then I went a little deeper.

I’m a soul. I’m a spiritual being having a human experience. Or even, I AM.
 
But for me – the roles didn’t feel like the deepest truth of who I was. And also, the spiritual lingo about being a soul, or just “I AM” – SOUNDED nice – but I didn’t know what to do with it.
 
I’m a soul.
 
Great – now what?
 
I’m a spiritual being having a human experience.
 
Awesome – what’s that mean? What’s the grounded action step there?
 
I didn’t know what to do with these definitions. It wasn’t grounded and actionable.
 
So, I kept on asking the question – and then one day… it hit me.
 
I know who I am. I’m a decider.
 
I get to decide – what I allow, what my standards are, what things mean, what I put in my mouth for food, who I hang out with, if I write each day or not, to have a spiritual practice or not.
 
I get to decide if I’m a human being having a spiritual experience or a spiritual being having a human experience. I get to decide.
 
I may not always get to decide what happens, when it happens or how it happens. I may not be able to just magically think away disease with a single thought. I can’t just decide to have more money in my bank account.
 
But – I can decide how I want to respond to the stimulus of the world. Which influences my health, relationships and finances.
 
So, I’ve decided that I’m a decider. I believe in the soul, I can feel it – but I can’t describe it to such a grounded degree that I can make the soul actionable.
 
But, I can make deciding actionable. What am I going to focus on? What am I going to make it mean? 

Is this the beginning or the end? Am I getting sicker or healthier? Should I really eat the chocolate or go for a banana instead? Do I want to watch Game of Thrones or write a blog?
 
And on and on and on the deciding goes.
 
When you really stop to think about this – it’s mind blowing how many decisions we make in a day. And how, with each conscious or unconscious decision we create our own perception of reality. And this perception ultimately will create evidence that it’s true (seek and ye shall find) – and then this evidence will reinforce what we believe.
 
Hostile Universe? Plenty of evidence for that. Will you believe it?
 
Friendly Universe? Plenty of evidence for that. Will you believe it?
 
Depending on what you choose – the outcome, evidence and path that your life will take could change dramatically.
 
So, think about something right now – a tough thing that you might be facing or going through. Maybe it’s a breakup, a dis-ease, starting a business, trying to lose weight or any ole challenge.
 
In the past – what did you make this challenge mean? What it the beginning or the end? Was it a punishment or a lesson?
 
And now – moving forward, what are you going to decide that this challenge means now? What could be the most empowering (yet not delusional) meaning you could give it."

_______________

"Intimacy is a byproduct of truth telling."

_______________

"We are the co-creators of our lives, which means we, in concert with The Uni-verse, can consciously design what kind of life we want to live…. 
If we consciously design our lives, then why take a job that makes you feel miserable? Why enter a relationship with someone who doesn’t value and cherish you? Why tolerate undesirable circumstances?
 
The Uni-verse doesn’t award points for martyrdom, unnecessary suffering or low self-esteem. We are Loved by The Uni-verse no matter what, but we were born to live a fulfilled life.
 
This cannot happen if we settle. If you need money and don’t have enough to live your own creative expression, then you may have to get a job you don’t love, but you have the power to choose the circumstances. You can design your life to make money and express yourself.
 
You can also choose to see challenging job circumstances as opportunities to grow and be grateful for the contrast of not getting what you want, so you can design what you do want.

Since you are the co-creator of your circumstances and how you respond to them, you get to actively choose what you do with your free time, how you interpret the events of your life and what your final goal is. A dead end job isn’t dead end if it’s helping pay your bills while you construct your masterpiece. Annoying coworkers aren’t annoying if you can see them as helping teach you love, self-love and acceptance.
 
Regarding dating, we all date at the level of our self-esteem. So if you’re not getting what you truly desire from your relationship, look into the true motives about why you choose who you choose.
 
Having high standards and not settling requires us to spend more time with and on ourselves, becoming the people it takes to create the life of our dreams. We don’t allow fearful or manipulative people, places and circumstances to dictate our outcome. We’d rather walk alone than with someone who drains us.
 
You have the same 24 hours in your day as everyone else. (Tweet-worthy!) You have the same opportunity to apply an empowering and loving meaning to the events and circumstances of your life. You have the opportunity to raise your self-esteem and date at the level of love and vulnerability rather than fear and manipulation.
 
What are you going to do with this power of choice?"

"I realize when someone is sending me negativity or hate, it’s not because I’m wrong or did something wrong, it’s a projection of what’s inside them onto me. And the same goes for me. When I’m in a negative or angry state, I tend to project that state onto others. ...
 
Let us EMBRACE and WELCOME darkness, anger, sadness and fear of others – KNOWING that it is simply a deeper request for LOVE. All anger at its core is a request for LOVE. All hate at its core is a request for LOVE."

"So that means the ONLY thing I can tell that we have control over is…. The MEANING we give the events and circumstances of our lives. And that meaning (aka thoughts) will determine our emotions, and those emotions will determine how we feel and those feelings will determine our actions.
 
So, it is wise to pay attention to the meaning we give the circumstances of our lives – far more than it is to pay attention to the circumstances themselves. An empowering meaning can transcend ANY circumstance....

What I’ve learned to do over time is to realize that when I feel that fear, I know I’m stepping outside of my comfort zone and it means that I am growing. So instead of using that fear as a reason to back down, I use it as a reason to move forward. I know that I am growing; I know that I am learning and loving more. I know that it’s NORMAL to feel this fear and so, instead of using it as a reason to stop, I use it as a reason to keep going."

"When I think about what held me back from living in a way that felt most connected - I see that it was a few things. 

1. The story I was telling myself about what I couldn't have what I want.

2. Not knowing the best-practices about how to make my dreams come true (trust me, there are strategies, it's not all pure luck)

3. Not believing that I was worthy of the success. ....

And my life has become a dance between those two beliefs. There are days of believing in myself and days of major self doubt. I've learned to let them both pass on by. 

My job now is to feel my feelings and be honest about them. It's about connecting back to myself and my Heart. It's to keep working and adding value to the lives of other people. And it's about constantly getting better and better at doing these things. Improving and innovating while remaining grounded and humble....

Work diligently each day to guard your mind and never let someone else tell you who you are. 

You are the decider. You get to choose...."

"There is a very fine line between excitement and anxiety. The only difference being anxiety has a negative perception of the future outcome and excitement has a positive anticipation for the future outcome."

"....when we start to belong to ourselves and express ourselves - we put out a different frequency and, as a result, we start attracting and meeting people who are on that new wave length. And what's so cool is in doing so, we no longer need to chase people. When we belong to ourselves, we find who else we belong to....."

- The Daily Love

_________________

“Take time now to determine what your greatest opportunity would be and what you need to do to get ready. What would you have to do to get ready for your dream opportunity? ….

Your habits determine your outcomes -- from the amount of money you make to the health and wellness you enjoy to the kind of relationships you're involved in. Habits determine how your future will unfold. Psychologists say that 90% of all our behavior is habitual. Habits help us operate on "auto-pilot" with mundane tasks, allowing our mind to be free for thinking and planning while we're taking a shower or driving to work, for example. The challenge is that some of our habits lock us into unconscious self-defeating behavior that can severely limit our success. To create higher levels of success, you're going to have to drop your bad habits and replace them with more positive ones. What's the easiest way to do this? Make a list of those habits that are unproductive or that negatively impact your future. Choose better, more productive success habits and develop systems that will help support the establishment of those habits…..

Surround yourself with positive people. If you think about it, there are people you meet in life who are positive, nurturing and uplifting. These are people who believe in you, encourage you and applaud your victories. Contrast that with "toxic" people -- the dream-stealers, the negative ones, the people who bring tension, stress and disorder to your day. Stop spending time with toxic people! And work hard to bring more positive, successful types into your life. There's a valuable exercise my own mentor W. Clement Stone taught me. Make a list of everyone you spend time with, then put a plus sign (+) next to the positive ones and a minus sign (-) next to the toxic ones. You'll probably see a pattern begin to form. Take steps now to either decrease the amount of time you spend with these toxic folks or set appropriate boundaries in how they relate to you…..

Ask as if you expect to get it. Assume you can get it. Ask someone who can give it to you. Be clear and specific when asking. Ask repeatedly until you get what you need or want. Of course, asking is always risky. You may get rejected... someone may say no. But remember that if you are turned down, you're actually no worse off than you were before you asked. You didn't have what you wanted before, and you don't have it now. What do YOU need or want to ask for? Have you ever made a list?”

- Jack Canfield 

_________________________

"Knowledge is an unending adventure at the edge of uncertainty." 
 
- Jacob Bronowski

________________________

"Follow your bliss." 
 
- Joseph Campbell